17

Exercise: Spin class with the always fabulous Krysta.  25 miles!  Woot woot!



So I've been reading The History of Love as of late.  Thus far, it is hauntingly beautiful.

I picked it up years ago at a half price book store, and I honestly can't remember the motivation to do so.  Curiosity?  A recommendation of one of the employees, perhaps?  Or maybe the title.  For I hear, the best place to understand something is to start at the beginning.  Explore its past.

Nonetheless, it sat on that bookshelf for countless hours/days/month/years, until the day came when a moment of honesty led the inquisitive girl to learn of love.


"Once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl, and her laughter was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering."

13, 14, 15, &16

I've been thinking quite a bit about the concept of light.  It started with this talk from last week's Women's General Meeting from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints:

Charity, a dear friend of mine, invited me to go and will I forever be grateful for that invite.

At the beginning of her talk, Sister Wixom invited the younger girls to stand and sing "Teach Me to Walk in the Light."  The conference center was peppered with countless little girls dressed in their best outfits, complete with little bows and sparkly shoes.  As they stood up timidly at first, glancing back at their mothers with shy smiles, Sister Wixom start to hum the first few notes of the song, and as she did so, the conference started to fill with these tiny voices of pure love. Innocent, heart overflowing voices that, as humble as they sang, pierced me to the core.

We joined in on the second verse "Come little child and together we'll learn..."  So many thoughts flooded me.  Of my future family and the realization that I will one day bring my little girl to future gatherings and hopefully have her experience such a moment.  Of my duty to be a leader to these impressionable minds. Of the truth that in that moment they were entirely teaching me how to walk in that light.

It reminded me of the power to change.  To choose to dwell in the light.

It's a developing thought, one that I plan on researching over this next bit.

Friday: stairs at work
Saturday: walk the three miles to and from conference
Sunday: 30 minute walk before Sunset
Monday:

8, 9, 10, 11, 12

Getting ready to walk out of work yesterday after a very busy and very productive day, I was finishing up a few tasks when Dr. A called from his desk "There's been another shooting at Fort Hood..."
"Excuse me?" I said, my voice laced with disdain as I thought he was somehow kidding with April Fool's recently in our wake.
"Yeah, it's on the news," he said, more sensitivity in his voice.
One look at his face and I saw this was no joke.

Now I know there are thousands of soldiers on Fort Hood, around 70,000 to be more accurate.  But I couldn't help the immediate concern I had for my friends back home.  I consider them family, really.  How I learned to so much from them... how I changed so, so much for the better simply by loving and serving them, and letting them love me.  I know it sounds cheesy, but there is something to be said when you get to the point with people that you drop all barriers and be your real self with them.

And so my stomach dropped as I reached for the phone.  First call, and then second.  And that was far to slow, so here is one of those times that I admittedly am grateful for Facebook.  One message later, and fears were abated.

All are safe and accounted for (how I feel for those who were not so lucky).  And my gratitude for each of my soldiers, my fellow friends, is deep tonight.


Exercise:
Sunday:  helped friends move (not a super workout, but I'm counting it)
Monday: walk
Tuesday: Spinning class and additional core class
Wednesday: Stairs
Thursday: calisthenics

Days 5, 6 & 7

Exercise: day 5 was rugby practice, 6 was spin class and 7 was the gruesome rugby game

Went to the LDS general women's meeting tonight.  Seriously moving experience 

Day 2 & 3 & 4

So I've been thinking as of late.  Entirely too much thinking honestly.

day 2 was YOGA, day 3 was spinning with Krysta, and day 4 was a walk.

Day One

I don't even know how to start with this.  Well, best to start from this morning.  George, a dear military friend of mine, said his good-byes after visiting for the week, and as I reached over to the phone to check the time, I saw a letter from my friend David.  I really hate the term "ex-boyfriend" because it just sounds so harsh, but I have yet to learn of another way to describe someone you loved so deeply at one point, and yet no longer have that life with anymore.  Of course I still have feelings of love of him, I think everyone always has a bit of love in their hearts for those who have influenced them in an intimate and meaningful way.  But, it's different now.  I now get it when I learned in my humanities classes the different forms of Greek love... Agape, Eros, Philia.  For, what I now feel for David is a friendship type of love.

So, the email was a bit of a surprise, since I hadn't heard from him for many o' months.  Honestly, while George was up here he mentioned that he hadn't seen David for a long while at the branch, so that was a bit concerning for me, especially since working in the ED for so many years, you can't help but think of worst case scenarios.

So I looked at the phone to read the subject line, "You should probably sit down before reading this."  I had seen that similar expression before with a few of my girlfriends, to which they followed with "I'm getting married!"  So naturally, I thought this was David emailing to say he'd got engaged.

Nope.

Quite the opposite, actually.  He's been diagnosed with a form of leukemia and will return home from Korea this week (as he is currently deployed there) to receive chemotherapy and additional treatments.  Don't know the prognosis yet.  We chatted via Gmail later in the day, and it was so hard to keep the conversation light; I tried my hardest not to bombard with a gazillion questions, but really, I have a habit of getting directly to the point.  I knew that that's what he was trying to do, to keep it light, but it was a bit of a struggle to kid around and still process the news.

I'm trying to find the points of gratitude in all this, and honestly it's a bit of a struggle.  But I am grateful to see he is still alive and did not die while combat.  I'm grateful he is coming back to the US to Walter Reed, and will be much closer to his parents.  I'm grateful that I have friends at the U that hopefully will be able to tell me more so that I can pass that information along to him.  And I'm grateful for the strength that can be found beyond ourselves during times of devastating crisis.

And those are my gratitudes for the day.  Day One.

I think a good walk is in order at this moment.

12

I'm grateful for:
Charity making an excellent dinner
teaching Brownies about a bit of medicine
the can of unicorn meat that one of my nurses gave to my device tech

Exercise: stairs during lunch

11

As you all know, I've been recovering from a bit of a cold.  So today while walking out of work I was happily strolling to the bus when a mad coughing spell hit.  It was so bad that with the last cough I may or may not have expelled air from multiple locations from my being.  And of course, OF COURSE, I was surrounded by people all heading to the same place.  And in these cases, these oh so joyous moments of life, there is nothing else to do but to deny, deny, deny.  So I immediately looked around me with that "who the hell had the audacity to fart in public" kind of look, furrowed brow and all.  You and I both know they didn't buy it, but at least I'm grateful it didn't happen while in an enclosed space. like the bus (give it time, friends.  It's bound to happen).

I'm grateful that I've learned how to laugh through the passing of... time.
2. Also grateful for Somer being so concerned about me last night after my phone died during our conversation that she started to drive up to check on me to make sure I hadn't been eaten by sharks.  True friendship.
3. Last, but not least, I'm grateful for the confidence I built in my Zumba classes while in Killeen.  Tonight I tried my hand at a u-jam class, and at the end the teacher was kind enough to say that I rocked it.  So thank you dear fierce Killeen instructor who taught me well

Exercise: u-jam dance class (hip hop)

10

I'm grateful for:
1. Tracking two days in a row on My Fitness Pal! Veeeery small victory, but I'm realizing that in order to achieve these goals of mine, I need accountability.  And a biking partner/work-out friend.  I think I may have found said biking partner in the boyfriend (shocking, I know.  I'm actually using the "b" word).  But!  He lives in a land far away, and I am in need of weekday work-out friend.  Now accepting applications.  ;)
2.  Being able to help in clinic today.  They were miserably swamped down there when I came down in the afternoon to check on a patient of mine, and though I only helped manage 2 patients (one didn't even need to see us really), they were so happy to have the help
3. My two attendings, Dr A. and Dr. H.  I'm realizing I'm very lucky with the two of them, because boy it can be waaaay worse

Exercise: spinning class at the gym (it's literally called "the gym")

9

I'm grateful for:

1.  The band "The Strike"

2.  The echo tech Tracey spending a bit of time explaining various cardiac US views

3.  The app My Fitness Pal.  Day one complete.

Exercise: Dancing

8

I'm grateful for:
1.  My dearest Philly friends Kristina and Angie.  I had dinner tonight with their families (Kristina and her husband and two kids were visiting her father as he is slowly dying of dementia.  Heart wrenching, really.  But she is a woman of great faith.  And Angie is 37 weeks pregnant, with a girl!! How happy I am for the two of them
2.  My two home teachers, Josh and Mikey, sitting next to me during sacrament.  Actually I was sandwiched between them, and throughout the service Mikey and I wrote back and forth about things that we were grateful for.
3. The Sunday school lesson today.  It was about Abraham and Isaac, and it helped me better understand the Atonement and our Father.  Good stuff.

Exercise: organizing the house

6 & 7

I promise!  I did day six.  In my head.

My father tells me when I was a little girl I used to answer questions the same way.  Example:

Dad: Jackie, did you have a good day today?
Me:
Dad: Jackie?
Me:
Dad: Jackie.
Me: Yep?
Dad: Did you just hear me ask you a question?
Me: Of course I did dad.
Dad: But you didn't answer...
Me: Yeeeeeah, I did.
Dad:  No... no you didn't.
Me: Yes, I did.
Dad: Nope.
Me: Yep.
Dad: I didn't hear anything.
Me: Well, that's because it was in my head.
Dad:
Me: I agree with you there.
Dad:
Me: Well said, dad.

Obviously a highly communicative family.

So.  I'm grateful for:
1&2. Jason making the drive to Park City to spend a bit o' quality time with me, & for making it home safely in the dark and snow
3&4.  Having a lovely chat with my new friend Nikki, the art gallery gal in Park City, & listening to the struggles and successes of a group of gals at the after conference party
5&6. Pulling off the side of the road to look up the location of the nearest Wal-Mart to discover I literally pulled on the street that landed me directly in front of one, & for the Wal-Mart being clean and well stocked

Exercise: 3 mile walk around Park City Yesterday, and a 5k on the elliptical AND calisthenics before the start of conference

5

"Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength."
-- Arnold Schwarzenegger

Oh dear Arnold.  How I love your wisdom.  And biceps.

I'm grateful for:
1. Today being my Friday!  Granted, I have a weekend CME conference, but it's in Park City with soon to be excellent company.  So, blessing
2.  Home teachers Josh and Mikey making the trip in the rain to come and visit.  Josh, as always, was full of insights and dearest Mikey gave such a sweet prayer.
3.  Dearest friend calling to report he was entirely "functional" today in that he entirely served those in his area.  I don't know if he'd call it that, but I will.  He's rising from the "mess" to be something better.  It made me think of Josh's quote tonight:

“I believe,” said President Thomas S. Monson, “the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and figuratively lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish—and in effect save their lives.”

4

"The art of being attentive is a journey to the seat of oneself."

I'm grateful for:

1.  being on my A game today at work.

2.  meeting a few new friends tonight at a ward activity.  I went to a German Christmas concert this past December with Charity and another gal whom I just re-met tonight.  I think her name was Kim :/ Must get better at this.  But!  Dave, a fella that I met my first week in the ward, came up and provided excellent conversation for a good chunk of the evening.  Biochemistry major turned philosopher.  Well read, loves music and the arts.  It's shocking to find a man that loves poetry.  (Kristi, he has his Masters in Library Science!)  I half want to set him up with one of my girlfriends, but I need to do a bit more research.

3.  laughing on the phone with Jason tonight.  Just thinking of it now makes me smile.  I told a girlfriend once what I'm looking for in a man (aside from the 3 "P's" as you already know) is one with whom I can wholeheartedly laugh.  And, friends, this house is filled with the glorious sound as of late :)

Exercise: 4 mile jog, and again the lovely walk to my car. 

3

I'm grateful for:
a.  NyQuil
b.  the extra soft Kleenex
c.  laptops.  I'm typing this from my bed as I keep one eye open.  sleep tight my friends

Exercise: spinning class and walk to my car in BFE parking lot after work

2

I'm grateful for:
1. making it through to the end of the day.  I woke up this morning with the classic symptoms of a viral infection (headache, body aches, productive cough, malaise) and I seriously debated about calling in sick.  But I didn't want to leave Dr. A alone to fend for himself with a full load of patients.  So I decided to buck it up and get the work done.
2. having a rewarding job.  I am starting to love this bit of work, and I'm realizing there is such opportunity for growth.  I can explore research if I wish, or improve current practice, etc.  The world awaits!
3. a lovely chat on the way home with Angel.  Great gal with great advice.


Exercise: I am seriously beat, but there's always enough energy to dance in the kitchen :)

1

“The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead; we remember that faith is always pointed toward the future.”  Jeffrey R. Holland, Created for Greater Things

I'm grateful for:
1.  My new friends Nicoletta and Sandra that I met on my walk up the canyon today.  They gave me great suggestions for things to do in the area.  Twilight series, movie at the capital, concerts at Red Butte Gardens
2.  Spending time on Skype with my family.  We had a mini FHE tonight with a scripture and song and all.  Mom chose the song "Families Can Be Together Forever" and Dad shared Joshua 1:9.  It was lovely
3.  My dad still acting like a kid.  As we were chatting, I could see him slowly move on the screen with Cheetos put in his mouth like a walrus.  And then he'd stick one out of his ear, or up his nose, or coming out of his glasses.  It was absolutely hilarious.


Exercise: 6 mile walk up the canyon

What Awaits Ahead

"The universe begins to look more like a great thought than a great machine."  -James Jeans

If you know me, you know that I have but few absolute truths.  One is that there is a supreme being that loves us all.  Another is that I know that life extends beyond the grave, and that the relationships that we have in this life will most certainly continue.

What I'm learning of late is that "the eternity of our souls has everything to do with our being here to learn lessons, the lessons involved nothing more complex than loving ourselves, which is far more difficult than I've realized before."  That comes to you from a reputable neurosurgeon that had a near death experience.

He indicates that the primary life lesson is love.  And faith.  "We are supposed to have faith in that eternity of souls, in that afterlife realm, in that heaven, in that dwelling place of the divine and not know it as clearly as the moon rising the sky every night.  That’s for a reason.  This is soul school."  I know that last line may sound a bit cheesy, but he says it with such authenticity that I have no doubts as to his motive.

It's Truth, folks.  With a capital "T"

For my future reference and research: 

Eben Alexander Lecture

Centering Prayer

Brene Brown The power of Vulnerability

Sacred Acoustics

Dead Symphony

Brene Brown The power of Vulnerability

Bioethics of Death

Frontier Science 

I'm grateful for:
a.  fantastic conversation with April and Charity tonight.  VT at it's finest
b.  lunch with the drug rep Aaron, learned about sub q ICDS
c.  Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog

Exercise: Strength and Stretch class AND stairs

5

I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person.  - Audrey Hepburn 

I'm grateful for:
a.  the glorious sun coming out today
b.  getting the house entirely cleaned up on my day off
c.  spending the evening with such splendid company, and learning a thing or two about cars and people for that matter.  Loved it :)

Exercise: walk along the canyon today

4

I'm grateful for:
a. Holiday tomorrow!!
b. Delivering the goodies to my VT gals
c. free cardiology lectures online

Exercise: walk to the various homes

3

I'm grateful for:
a.  filling a bit of the faith canteen
b.  finishing up a few credits of CME
c.  changing my own headlight on my car


Exercise: I'm starting to love stairs

Dream a Little Dream of Me...

Tonight was the first night in, I don't know how long, that I stayed up watching a TV series.  It's been years folks.  But, there was just something that hit close to home that captured my attention.  Emily Owens, MD.  My sister told me about it a few months back, mentioning in passing that she basically found a show based on my life.  It's kind of hilarious, and slightly embarrassing to admit, but she nailed it on the head.  Me.  In a nut shell.  Simply replace the sweaty pits for super bright blushing, and you've got me.

I'm grateful for:

a.  having a minute to watch a TV show, actually a good 10 episodes in one night!

b. munching on a delicious bowl of Lucky Charms at like 2

c.  having Monday off to get caught up on charts!

Workout: stairs, stairs, and more stairs.

Long Week

I'm grateful for:
a. being snuggled up in my bed while typing this
b. learning how to communicate with my colleagues with respect and professionalism.  There's a gal at work whom I am starting to see is the epitome of a "mean girl," saying things that are borderline bullying.  Rather than reacting to her behavior, I stop a moment and think and then respond in a healthy and productive way.  That's the only way for a positive change
c. I flew to Blanding today for outreach clinic, and I met this wonderful woman Etta, who was the director of the small hospital/clinic there.

and a One and a... One

That's right, I missed my workout yesterday, which means I start over at one. Oh, how I love you, my dearest one.

Grateful for:
a. new beginnings ;)
b. A good chat with Dr. A today.  For the past few months I haven't really known how I'm doing since I haven't gotten much feedback, and I wondered if they were pleased with my work thus far.  So today I asked.  Glad I did, good feedback :)
c. My Mom texting this evening

Exercise: Strength and stretch class

12

“In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.” ― Robert Frost

I'm grateful for:
a.  Dr. A being able to talk to a new patient in his native tongue (Arabic).  A huge dose of what that man needed was reassurance and support, and there's something to be said about finding someone with a deep understanding of your struggles.  Dr. A gave that to him today.
b.  the knowledge I have of an afterlife.  We had a patient come in today, the last one of the day, with whom we had the end of life discussion.  Usually I've had these conversations with the son or daughter of an aged and demented parent, but today we had a discussion with a completely coherent gal.  End stage kidney disease, previously had a pacemaker placed for slow heart beats, and that's why she was seeing us.  A life filled with trouble and long battle with mental health issues.   And now she opted not to do anything for her kidneys, but rather she is choosing to, as they say, go gentle into that dark night.  When will that be? Who knows.  Can you imagine living the rest of your days with the knowledge that any day could be the last?  Perhaps it's liberating in a way.
c.  my neighbor bringing up the trash cans

Exercise: miss!  Too late staying up Sunday and the Monday morning routine suffers.

11

So today I realized that I've been here in Utah for about 4 months now.  Well, that went fast.

Moving here, I didn't think it would be a trial of my faith.  But if I'm honest, it has.  Notably.  There are few things in this life that I know; one thing I know for sure is that I'm supposed to be here.  What I'm having a difficult time understanding is why.  Cursed why.


I'm grateful for:
a.  the strength that an individual can show during a time of great adversity (I was listening to a podcast of a couple that survived a plane crash that left considerable physical damage to their bodies.  This news is old news, I've seen it before, as I'm sure you have.  But for some reason, today it struck a cord.)
b.  the honesty and authenticity that they share in overcoming that struggle
c.  the option to choose to be "better or bitter"

Exercise: A walk 

10

I'm so grateful for:
a.  going to bed the same time as my 90 y/o neighbor
b.  My friend, Dulce, helping me connect with an incredible group of girls for future races
c.  Learning to smile through the pain :)

I didn't train for this race, and so by the fourth hour I was definitely feeling it.  I could have stopped a few times... I even started to make plans to finish at 12:00, and then look at the clock to see 12:08, and think, okay 12:15 then, and then look again and see it was 12:23, yet again thinking, okay 1230 then is it.  15 minutes before 1 pm cut off (the end time of the race), I thought, "This is the last lap.  You've done enough.  And you can beat the swarm of people ending at one, and you need to stretch anyway" but my friend Dulce and her friend Sherrie can up and started to walk with me.  One lap around, chatting away with those girls.  I looked at the clock and realized I had just a few minutes to go till one; instead of quitting, I chose to go that one more lap to finish it properly.  I know it seems like something so small.  And it was, really.  But I've realized... It's not about the lap.

Exercise: a few laps shy of a Half Marathon for a Revolutionary Run

9

1.  I'm grateful for:
a.  Men that know how to man up
b.  my co-workers.  I work with a bunch of ridiculously hilarious guys that make the time pass so fast.  I've direly needed to fill that hole that was made by moving away from Fort Hood.  Don't get me wrong, I love my girl friends, but there is something to be said about having a guy friend in your life that, for me at least, makes it feel like home.  I guess that's what comes with having only brothers growing up
c.  singing in the shower at zero dark thirty

Exercise: it's paying off.  I was stuck at a plateau for a minute there, but now were back on track.  You and I both know I'm not one of those crazy people, but I kind of see what they mean when they say "the good kind of pain."

8

I'm grateful for:
a.  My social spirit and confident ability to put myself out there.    Tonight for the first stretch and strength class at the U, you could hear crickets as soon as you walked in the door. Even the teacher was very timid and kind of anxious. And so I thought I'd help her out by easing the tension with a comment or smile
b. The Jillian Michaels dvds that I've been doing up to that point.  She had us hold planks for an eternity and a day, and because of my training,  was able to outlast all but one in the class. Even the strong muscle guy bowed out before me.   Muahahaha!
C.  The Lord's ability to humble.  So i just listed two things that are borderline bragging, and so now I wait for the "opportunity for growth" from the big guy...

Exercise: stretch and strength class

7

I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.

Audrey Hepburn 



I'm grateful for:
a. being on top of visiting teaching.  And having a different perspective for that matter.  I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I once looked at it as a bit of a chore, and now... that's changed entirely.
b. Registering for my first race of the season, which will be this Saturday.  Run/walk/crawl for 5 hours straight around the Olympic Oval.  Wish me luck!
c.  Being a source of information for my friends.  I used to be nervous thinking I'd guide them wrong, but after a few years of practice, I feel my education can be of benefit to the folks I love most.

Exercise: running and stairs

6

I'm grateful for:
a.  My dearest Somie!  We spent the entire evening chatting away like the olden days.  I absolutely adore this girl.  Exhibit A

b.  So at dinner she told me about this guy who is one of her nursing students, and let's just take a minute to turn to the play by play...

Somer: "Where do you work?"
Brian: "I'm on the PICC team at the U"
Somer: "Oh, my friend Jackie is a PA up there with the cardiac guys"
Brian: "She hasn't been there very long, right?"
Somer: "Yeah, like 2 months"
Brian: "She's like young?"
Somer: "Yeah"
Brian: "Tall?"
Somer: "Yep."
Brian: "Pretty blonde, right?"
Somer: "Right!"

Seriously, best story ever.  I may be blushing a bit

c.  Getting caught up on my paperwork and phone messages.  woo hoo!


Exercise:  10 min Jillian Michael's Core Training

5

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” ― Mae West


I'm grateful for:
a.  Dr. A having his sister come visit him.  I could tell it really made him happy :)
b.  Bustin' a move in the kitchen to this gem :)
c.  Figuring out why it sounded like a patient was in normal sinus rhythm on physical exam though her underlying rhythm from her pacemaker detection showed she was completely in atrial fibrillation.  Answer: She was being 100% paced in the ventricle!  And I got it right!  woot woot!

Exercise: Jillian Michael's 30 day shred

4

It's not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not. -Anonymous


I'm grateful for:
a.  Watching the movie UP with Tristan, my 2 y/o nephew.  Watching the montage of Ellie and Carl with him resting on my chest and peering up smiling at me now and again... it choked me up a bit.
b.  You know how you on occasion have those moments of doubt in yourself.  Doubt in your skill set, doubt in what the future holds, doubt in your direction of life.  Well, I had one of those today.  And in those moments of doubt, a trusted friend helped me see the value that dwells within.  How grateful I am for those who lift you up, especially in those vulnerable times.
c.  Nap time :)

Exercise: Thought I'd try something less intense on Sundays, so I gave Jillian Michael's Yoga a go.  I forgot how much I love yoga!

Random Act of Kindness: Greg and Lisa needed a sitter last minute for last night, so I helped out.  How I love them dearly.  I think they are a big reason why I felt prompted to moved here.  There is something to be said about feeling like you have the love of your family so close to you.

3

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. -Wayne Gretzky

What a wonderful day!  How I love this life :)  Today Lisa taught me to cross country ski in none other than Liberty Park in downtown SLC.  It was just too funny, for I always thought one could only go skiing in the mountains; I never considered the park next door.  This, I can tell, has opened a world of "urban recreation."  I'm already looking at the forecast and the hills behind my house.  Bonus, you can rent skis at REI for like $12.   The snow is calling, my friend ;)

I'm grateful for:
a.  The cashier, Gary, at the gas station that gave me 2 bucks in quarters to fill up my tires.  Totally sweet :)
b.  Brian, the awesome technician at Sam's Club Tire that discovered why the two tires were flat (cursed nails!), patched them up, and didn't even charge me!  How cool is that!
c.  Last, but certainly not least, Lisa Smith, my ski instructor and dear friend that took the entire morning to teach me the basics of skiing, and had the patience of a saint when I slowly dragged myself from falling.  She is such a great gal.  Seriously solid people that live out here.

Exercise: Cross country skiing for a few hours, and Jillian Michael's DVD (I promised a dear friend I'd do it for 30 days straight with her)

2

I'm grateful for:
a.Dr. H taking the time to explain PVCs to me this evening
b.  laying in front of the fire cozied up to a book
c.  getting out of bed to do my gratitudes

3.  Exercise: JM Last Chance WOrkout DVD

Imma Need You to Commit Miss Jackie

Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. -Jim Ryan

So it's the New Year and I've already started it off on the left foot, which is... GREAT, because the right foot is sure to follow.  It's all about perspective, my friend.  

Let's talk goals:

Physical:

• 2 big races this year, LOTOJA or equivilant, & I'm thinking of finally tackling a marathon 
• 31 lbs gone by summer.  Non-negotiable.
• Clean up the diet.  Replace fruits for the crap sugars.  No candy from the candy dish at work for 1 month... that's right, I'm talking to you, little Miss 5 Fingers Discount Queen  

Spiritual:

• Find ways to serve the community at large
• These gals at church need some encouragement; be that encouragement, Miss Jackie.  You've got that calling now, fulfill it to the fullest.  Appreciate the sacrament more fully, prepare for it.  Find a way to connect to Him more deeply.
• Get to know the various religious organizations of SLC; learn of their culture and appreciate their insight

Financial:

• I was gonna say "Create and live by a budget," but really, I know how to save.  Like, really really well.  What I don't do is spend on the joys of life.  So this year I'm budgeting one day a month specifically for Jackie.  It shall hence forth be known as "Zen and the Art of Jackie Maintenance" (ZAJM for short).  Haircut, massage, mani/pedi, sure.  Hike, bike, dance... even better. Learn to rock climb in Utah, surf on the beaches of Cali, or kayak in Alaska, heck yeah! Confession: I may have just Googled How to Pamper Yourself to get ideas.  Suggestions?
• Replenish Savings, fully contribute to Retirement Accounts

Mental/Emotional:

• Read "Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy" by David Burns.  So many therapists that I worked with suggested that as the #1 read for our patients.  I feel mildly like a hypocrite that I've recommended it to many o' patient without reading it in its entirety.  That's gonna change.
• By the end of the year, fully implement the 5 points of Positive Psychology in your little life (Each day: 3 points of gratitude, journal 1 positive experience within 24 hrs of it happening, exercise daily, meditate, and random act of kindness)

Professionally

• On more days of the week than not, study from the best books
• You're paying for a JAAPA subscription, why don't you take advantage of the CME credits (for free, mind you!)
• Start looking into what needs to be done to retake the boards... it's coming up sooner than you think

On that note we're working on completing two of the FiVE:

 I'm grateful for:

1. Lisa's sense of humor.  That girl is hilarious :)

2.  Kristi's undeniable determination.  She's keeping at her goals, which motivates me to keep to mine

3.  Great conversations with dear friends.  One of my dearest friends and I talked last night for like 2 hours, felt like minutes and millennia all rolled into one.  He said it best, "As cliche as this is Jackie, this just flowed"

Exercise: JM Biggest Loser DVD before work this AM.  Bonus, no candy from the candy dish!  Woot!